Hi, my name is Jennifer and I am a worry wart. (“Hi Jennifer”). I have been a worrier, anxiety prone, basket case most of my life, but never more so than since having children.
Do you realize how terrifying our world is? No one does until they have children. We all go along fat, dumb and happy and have no idea that so many things in this world are trying to kill us, eat us, harm us or destroy us. It’s only when you are given the impossible task of birthing and taking responsibility of a tiny human that the reality hits you. It’s relentless. Every day you are faced with choices on how to best protect them, nourish them, and care for them. And every day any one of those choices you make could kill them. It’s flabbergasting that ANY of us ever makes it through childhood.
As a parent, I definitely tend to error on the side of being over protective. Ok, maybe hovering. Ok, true transparency–if I could have a camera drone that followed my children every where they go–I would. It would need to be equipped with a microphone so I could shout reminders like– “Look both ways!” or “Use a tissue not your sleeve!”. AND it would be nice if it had a weapons arsenal for just in case a stranger tried to swipe them or harm them in any way. I know–you don’t have to tell me–I need to chill.
In Luke 12:25 it says “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?”
God has been trying to convey that message to me for a while now and I have to tell you–I’m not having a good time with this. As my kids are getting older, I’m being forced to let go more and more. Saying “It’s hard” does not do justice the wide array of excruciating emotions I am experiencing.
Just recently, our older son went to a weekend church camp. He was gone a total of 36 hours and I was an absolute wreck the entire time. When I was a kid, I had a GREAT time going to all the church lock ins and camps and I can tell you– I never ONCE thought about how my parents were coping with it (sorry Mom and Dad). Logically, I knew he was fine and having a good time, but I found myself longing for the reassurance.
And that’s really all I want in raising my boys. I want to KNOW they’re safe. I want to KNOW that they’re being treated well by others. I want to KNOW that nothing bad will never, ever, EVER happen to them. Not asking for much, eh?
Oh, how I wish that’s the way life worked. But, it’s not. So, I have a choice to make. My boys are going to grow up whether I want them to or not. (I’ve tried freezing time and well…it didn’t work). I can do my part–love them, care for them, teach them, pray for them, and yes–let go of them OR I can cling to them and not only make myself miserable, but them too. It’s the control that I’m looking for and THAT is what I have to let go of.
You’re doing great momma…worry is our biggest worry. Don’t let the outside world weigh you down. You are right …it is hard to stand back and let them grow.
Thank you Gaylyn! I agree–worry IS our biggest worry. Well said!
Jennifer, I worry about my kids EVERY DAY. Even as adults, I worry if they are driving safe in yucky weather, if they are making enough money to pay their bills, if they have had their teeth cleaned lately, 😉, etc. I speak with them daily, and let them know I am thinking of them. They know I worry too much. And that I love them 😁❤
It’s so good to know I’m not the only one. Haha! Here’s the really crazy part–I worry that if I STOP worrying, that’s when something bad will happen. I don’t remember any of this being in the “So you want to be a parent” brochure.