It’s been a few weeks now and I’m starting to feel a little more comfortable and safe in our environment. So, I feel like now would be a good time to confess a somewhat embarrassing fact about me… (deep breath) I blurt. I’m a blurter. When I say I blurt–I mean I blurt A LOT. I blurt at social gatherings. I blurt at the grocery store. I even blurt at church. I feel like I have no control over it.
In any given situation where conversation is happening, I go through the same thing over and over again. Tick, tick, tick, the other person just keeps on talking and talking. I start to panic because the subject is going to change any second now and I feel I have something VERY important to add to the discussion. So what do I do?
I blurt. Out gushes the tidal wave of thoughts I had been storing up for well over a minute–I take my moment on the stage and like a machine gun–bam, bam, bam I hit them with every thought that had been rolling through my brain. In the moment, I don’t care that I just completely interrupted the other person. I feel that if I don’t say what you need to say RIGHT NOW my head is going to explode. This is URGENT!
As the words come spilling out, I don’t dare take a breath, because that means they could horn in on my onslaught of unsolicited wisdom, clever anecdotes, and totally relatable stories. But as quick as the urge to speak comes–it stops. I panic, because in my excitement to interject, I completely lost my train of thought. To cover, I just keep right on talking in hopes that I can somehow bring it back around to the topic at hand. For the first time, I take a second to glance at the other person. It’s always the same look.
Finally, realizing that I just inadvertently blurted, I end up saying something really lame like “Anyway…….” and kind of just let it fade off. I find myself sort of looking around and shuffling a bit in hopes that they didn’t notice my blurt.
If you are wondering if, you too, might be a blurter ask yourself these questions:
- In a social gathering of any sort–party, church group, even meeting a fellow mom at your children’s school–do you find yourself full of anxiety while the other person or people are talking?
- Is your mind racing around thinking only of what you could add to the conversation, the wisdom you could impart, or of some really funny story you want to share?
- As the seconds tick by and the other person just keeps talking and talking and talking, do you feel your blood pressure rising and the words you want to share rising up in your throat?
- Do you feel like it’s trying to push back a tidal wave to keep those words from escaping your mouth too soon?
- And then, with no warning, the dam breaks and you find yourself speaking in rapid succession completely unaware or unconcerned that you just interrupted the other person?
If you answered yes to any of these, then you might be a blurter. Don’t worry. I think everyone blurts at some time or another. There are many causes for a case of the blurts: Many of us are stay at home mom’s and don’t get much social interaction except with our young toddler talking little people–that can certainly cause the blurts. Too much caffeine can also be a cause. I never blurt more than when I’ve just had a strong cup of coffee. Don’t be ashamed if it happens to you. Just politely say excuse me, confess that you have the blurts and move on. Sometimes you will find that the person you’re talking with has the blurts too.