Guess what time it is? Anyone? That’s right–it’s time to make New Year’s resolutions. Actually, it’s two weeks into this brand new year and I’m late to the party. I should have already made them and been failing at them by now. Don’t worry…I’ll catch up.
I read an article a while back that stated the reason we fail at our resolutions year in and year out is because we are calling them resolutions rather than goals. Well, good gracious! If I had known this, my life could have been so much different by now. So, here goes. “My goal for this year is to lose 20 pounds” There. Done. Think I’ll write a book about it while I munch on a bags of Doritos and peanut M&M’s.
Man, I wish it was that easy. After so many years of doing this “new year, new you” routine, I’m finally ready to surrender that it’s just not working. This is hard for me because I LOVE lists. I love dreaming about them, making them, and looking at them. I just don’t always love DOING them. You’ve heard the phrase “I’m a lover not a fighter”? Well, I’m a dreamer not a doer.
It makes me wonder though–why is it so hard for me? Last year, I read another article that talked about how important it was to not only write down your goals, but to also write a plan on how to achieve those goals. Okay.
What is my goal? To lose weight. How do I plan to achieve that goal? Stop putting so much food in my mouth and get up out of my chair more.
Nope. Still not working.
I’m beginning to realize that the experts are missing some important pieces of the puzzle when it comes to giving “expert” advise.
1.I’m human. As humans we have something in us called a human nature. Any time I attempt to make positive changes in my life– that nature screams louder than a banshee “You’ve never done things this way before! We don’t like change! We don’t DO change!”
2. Reality and life. With every success that has ever occurred in my efforts, there are two little words that cause it all to come to a screeching halt:
But then.
As an example: In trying to lose weight, I may spend weeks being good and making awesome progress. But then, we have a Super Bowl party and folks bring food that I haven’t had in forever and it smells so good and looks so good. The temptation is overwhelming and I find myself diving in and stuffing my face as if I were getting paid to do so. All that progress–undone in a single day.
3. The “feeling” factor. When I don’t feel like doing something, I don’t do it–and no one can make me. We live in a world that is programming us to follow our feelings in everything. Writing down goals and dreaming about them FEELS good. Doing the actual hard work that it requires to achieve those goals does NOT feel good. In fact most days it feels awful. Depriving myself of a giant piece of chocolate cake with a scoop of vanilla ice cream on the side does not make me feel happy. It makes me feel like throwing a big ole toddler size fit and screaming “I want it, I want it, I want it!!”.
So, what do I do? Do I give up? Do I just say “why bother?”. It’s tempting. I’m SO tired of failing. But, this year as I sat down to make my list, I realized I had something going on inside of me that had not been there before. I am determined. I have finally reached that magical place we all must come to if we’re going to see real change in our lives. I have developed a gritty determination that makes me want to experience success more than I want to live with failure.
My hope is to share my journey with you. I have been inspired by so many sharing their stories and that is my desire too. Once a month or so, I’ll share my progress (or lack thereof) as I seek to tackle my 2020 Goals. Some of them, I’m sorry to say, are pretty cliché and not very exciting, but others are bigger and more intimidating and stretching me outside of my comfort zone.
I look forward to sharing this with you all and hope you will lend me your best wisdom, prayers and support along the way.
Oh you go girl, I will be following along ,all the way. Wish I had your grit, but hopefully it will find its way to me soon.
Gaylyn, from what I learned about you in the couple of times we have met–you have more grit inside your little pinky than I will probably ever have in my life time. Thank you for your comment and for always encouraging me!